Yoga & Re-birth

I began my adventure this week with two hot yoga classes; It was my first time back in three years. I remember now why I loved it back then. It is a perfect balance of strength and effort and surrender. The teacher began the first class by asking us to create an intention to hold for the next 75 minutes. I set mine as "kindness". I am competitor, a striver, and, at times, a bull in a china shop. And so my practice was to allow myself to rest or modify when I needed to, and to allow that to be ok. Our teacher reminded us to be grateful to ourselves for showing up, to listen to our bodies, and to give ourselves permission to rest. A novel idea. Giving ourselves permission to rest; to cease striving; to be, without needing to be more, to be further along, to be able to do what s/he is doing. Ahhhhh. How yoga doth teach us...
And, although it's only one week into my challenge, I must admit that I feel a swell of energy and enthusiasm for these next four months. I want to do all of those things, and, if you will notice, there is not a single "resolution" on there, i.e. "eliminate caffeine", "lose 10 pounds", "double my client base". Rather, this is a rebirth of sorts for me. A way to re-engage in my life as a 30-something woman who also happens to be a mama now.
I was pregnant with Amelia for 9 months before she was born. She is now 9 months old. Perhaps I've been pregnant with the next iteration of my life, holding the mystery of how to include it all. It reminds me of the Chinese symbol, the yin and the yang. The birth of Amelia, and the re-birth of her mama.
On the yoga mat, I am reminded that there is a flow and a balance; a time to rest and a time to strive. And to appreciate ourselves for showing up.